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Sunday, November 1, 2026: the Redskins host the Eagles under the Sunday night lights, the Caps host the Wild in a pick'em matinee, and history recalls the 1964 sweep of Philadelphia.
Saturday, October 31, 2026: the Bullets take their NBA Cup opener behind Dybantsa's home debut, the Caps ride Tuch's league-leading fifth game-winner, and Halloween history belongs to Sammy Baugh.
Sonny and Coach break down Dybantsa's home debut against Charlotte, the Caps' 4-3 win at Nashville, the Redskins' Sunday night test against Philadelphia, the Nats' first offseason move, and the seventh anniversary of the 2019 Game 7 title — plus tonight's slate and Vegas board.
Sonny and Coach run Thursday's full slate, the Bullets' glass loss in Cleveland and Dybantsa's debut, the Redskins' deadline math, the Caps' trip to Nashville, the Nats' offseason ledger, Mike Gartner's birthday, and tonight's Vegas board.
Sonny and Coach break down the Rays' twelve-inning stay of execution, the Bullets' road test in Cleveland, the Caps' homestand finale, the Redskins' trade-deadline math, and the Nats' offseason ledger — plus tonight's Vegas board.
Sonny and Coach run Tuesday's full slate, the Bullets' rebounding loss in Charlotte, the Redskins' open-for-business deadline posture, the Caps' wait for Thompson, the Nats' bullpen math, the 2019 Game 5 anniversary, and tonight's Vegas board.
Sonny and Coach run Monday's full slate, the Bullets' trip to Charlotte, the Redskins' bye-week deadline math, the Caps' wait for Wednesday, the Nats' Abrams winter, Jordan's debut against the Bullets, and tonight's Vegas board.
Sonny and Coach break down the Bullets' 124-120 survival in Chicago, the Caps' 4-3 overtime win over Buffalo, the Redskins' bye-week deadline math, the Nats' Abrams winter, the 2015 24-point comeback, Pedro Martinez's birthday, and tonight's Vegas board.
Sonny and Coach break down World Series Game 2, the Bullets' back-to-back test at Chicago after the Raptors loss, the Redskins' bye-week audit, Tuch's reunion game against Buffalo, the Nats' Abrams winter decision, DeAngelo Hall's four-pick afternoon, and tonight's Vegas board.
Sonny and Coach break down World Series Game 1, the Bullets hosting the Raptors as home underdogs, the Redskins' bye-week audit, the Caps' cap squeeze, the Nats' Abrams winter decision, the 2005 FedExField rout, and tonight's Vegas board.
Sonny and Coach break down Anthony Davis's 34-point Bullets debut win, Terry McLaurin's contract math at the bye, the Caps' cap-room squeeze, the Nats' 65-million-dollar winter, the 1972 RFK classic, and tonight's Vegas board.
Sonny and Coach break down McLaurin's season-ending injury and its contract math, the Bullets' home opener as favorites, the Caps' loss to the Kings, and the Nats' bullpen numbers — plus the 2018 doink anniversary and tonight's Vegas board.
Episode 9. Friday, October 30, 2026. The market stops paying for the story and asks for the receipt: Intel falls about twenty-nine percent on guidance, Amazon slides on spending, and the Nasdaq closes its worst month since March 2025. Sterling teaches free cash flow, explains Chevron in plain English, and marks the oil majors' refining windfall. GameStop Watch: GME 24.23, second straight up session, warrants expire, crown holds. Market data parsed, meme chaos reported. Not financial advice.
Episode 8. Friday October 30, 2026, the morning edition: Thursday's close, Amazon and Intel fall after the bell, the Bank of Japan holds at 1.25 percent and declares its inflation target reached, and the GameStop warrants stop trading. Sterling teaches after-hours and premarket trading, explains ExxonMobil in plain English ahead of its Friday print, and marks the October 30, 1929 rebound. GameStop Watch: GME 23.90, warrants expire Friday, crown holds. Market data parsed, meme chaos reported. Not financial advice.
Episode 7. Thursday, October 29, 2026. The indexes fall but the average stock rises: Alphabet drops more than twelve percent, small caps gain, Eli Lilly hits a record, and Amazon misses after the close. Sterling teaches dividends, explains Amazon in plain English, and marks the Hurricane Sandy market shutdown. GameStop Watch: GME 23.90, first up session after six down, warrants expire Friday, crown holds. Market data parsed, meme chaos reported. Not financial advice.
Episode 6. Thursday, October 29, 2026 — the show's first 5:01 AM edition; Diamond Hands now runs at both 5:01s. Wednesday's close: the Federal Reserve holds at 3.75 to 4.00 percent in a 10-2 vote with two dissents for a hike; Microsoft beats and rises after hours while Alphabet misses and falls about ten percent; and a correction — Meta reported on October 21, not last night. Sterling teaches circuit breakers, explains Apple ahead of its November 2 print, and marks the Black Tuesday anniversary, ninety-seven years on. GameStop Watch: GME 23.33, sixth straight down session, warrants expire Friday, crown holds. Market data parsed, meme chaos reported. Not financial advice.
Episode 5. Wednesday, October 28, 2026. Tuesday's close: chips rise a third straight session, Boeing caps the Dow with a ten percent fall, and the Fed decides today. Sterling teaches the price-to-earnings ratio, explains Meta in plain English, and marks the October 28, 1929 Black Monday anniversary. GameStop Watch: GME 23.36, fifth straight down session, crown holds. Market data parsed, meme chaos reported. Not financial advice.
Episode 4. Tuesday, October 27, 2026. Monday's rebound was real but narrow: an Anthropic S-1 filing and the chips carried the index while oil eased and Fed week began. Sterling teaches market-cap weighting, explains Alphabet ahead of its Wednesday print, and marks the October 27, 1997 mini-crash anniversary. GameStop Watch: GME 23.90, fourth straight down session, crown holds. Market data parsed, meme chaos reported. Not financial advice.
Episode 3. Monday, October 26, 2026. Sterling anchors on Friday's verified close, teaches how to read an earnings report in four lines, and explains Microsoft in plain English ahead of its Wednesday print. Black Monday enters Winners and Losers on its anniversary week. GameStop Watch: Cohen's October purchases from the filings, ninety million dollars of them, and a close below the king's own prices. Market data parsed, meme chaos reported. Not financial advice.
Episode 2. Friday October 23, 2026 close: oil spikes, the Dow drops 652, the ten-year yield returns to five percent. Sterling runs the verified numbers, explains American Express in plain English, and reopens the Long-Term Capital Management file. Dee scans Wall Street Bets. GameStop Watch: GME 24.82, crown holds. Market data parsed, meme chaos reported. Not financial advice.
The premiere of 5:01 Diamond Hands on NEON. Sterling hosts a format specimen built from the January 2021 GameStop record: short interest and gamma mechanics taught, never prescribed; the January 29, 2021 close read in words; wallstreetbets reported as culture; GameStop Watch with Ryan Cohen and Deep Fucking Value, the king nerds of Meme Mountain; and Knight Capital in Winners and Losers. Produced by Edgar. Not financial advice.